Just so you know, it has very little with how long you last, how big your penis is or any tricks or techniques.

I remember the first time I heard a friend use this concept…

We were in a bath under the stars surrounded by candlelight… yeah, I know pretty lush indeed and we were sharing about our sexual experiences with our respective partners and at one point she said…


“The consciousness in his cock is so powerful”.


I had never heard it put this way before but as she uttered those words, it put every sexual encounter I’ve ever had into perspective and what really made the difference.

What made the difference was how present my partners were in their cocks and how they were touching me with it!

Here is the thing, you can penetrate a woman, experience pleasure, even ejaculate and not have touched that woman at all.

You may have been in your head thinking about your performance 


You may have been so focused on your sensations you missed meeting her body with yours.

Now for some of you that won’t make sense, I hear you say “but my penis is touching her”…

That’s not enough.

If you really want to touch her, you need to meet her with your whole being concentrated in your sex centre.

That might sound complicated but it’s actually very simple.


Just bring your attention into your sex centre and FEEL… 

really FEEL her with it.


If you are able to be fully present with the point of contact between you and her, your cock and her vagina, it will feel to her like you are meeting your heart with her heart, your soul with her soul.

Too often women report feeling used in sex because they feel their space is used for their partner’s pleasure.

Often the men I have talked to don’t even realise what they are doing, they really love their partner and deeply want to please them but when they enter their bodies something else takes over they miss to truly feel them in the process.

If you want to be a better lover and yes have her begging for more, slow down, stop your mind wandering, breath into your own sensations and move past yourself into feeling inside her at that point of contact… And meet her there.

With love

Elise Savaresse

Elise Savaresse is the founder of The Yoniverse.

She has been deeply involved in exploring Female Sexuality and Conscious Relating for the last decade.

She has an online program for women supporting them to reconnect with the power and wisdom of their Yonis, and she travels all over Australia and overseas offering workshops and retreats for men, women and couples.

Her vision is to support men and women to experience the beauty and sacredness of sexuality and have thriving relationships.

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